Wednesday, 5 January 2011

Till death do us part...or maybe not...

So you and your "hubby/wifey to be" are getting closer to the wedding day, the wedding gown is ready, flowers have been chosen and the cake's been ordered and suddenly your partner says, "Errr honey I've been thinking, I want a pre-nup?" What would your reaction be....

 A few of my friends were discussing the issue of pre-nups, which are now legal in the UK after Paper heiress Katrin Radmacher won a £100million divorce battle in October 2010. The Supreme Court ruling against her ex husband effectively gave pre-nuptial agreements official status in English law. The 41-year-old heiress only had to pay ex hubby Nicolas Granatino £1million from her vast fortune. (personally £1 million is still a lot and that would have still been plenty for me...)

The Supreme Court’s ruling brought England into line with most of Europe and the US where pre-nups are legally binding. Previously in the United Kingdom, pre-nuptial agreements had no legal standing. "The divorce courts had the last word in the division of all matrimonial property and would ignore any pre-nuptial agreement if they thought that it was in any way unreasonable to either of the parties involved, particularly regarding to the maintenance and housing of children. For example, regardless of whose name a couple’s property was in, a court could order it to be transferred to the other. This applied to all property that was owned separately or jointly." (Weddingguideuk)

A pre-nuptial agreement (pre-marital agreement) is a written contract between a couple before they are married that sets out how their assets are to be distributed (or remain theirs) should their marriage fail. Hhhmmm.

This brings me to a very important question, should Christians have pre-nups?
Personally I think that pre nups indicate a lack of faith in your relationship and I don't understand why any Christian would even want one. It is almost as if you're saying, this marriage is probably not gonna work and if so I don't want the other person to use me and run away with some of my money. This seems to also denote a lack of trust in the other person and creates a shaky foundation for your marriage from the onset. But that's my own view. What do people think about this issue? Is there anything in the bible that can help people decide on the best course of action...?

If you were stinking rich and getting married, would you have one?


  1. Not a good thing to consider as a believer. It brings with it its own baggage.

    Just because the world considers something necessary doesn't mean it's right for us.

    Jesus is all the pre-nup we need.

  2. A very thoughtful post....touches one of the realities of life; TRUST!

    To your question; should xtains sign pre-nups?


    My experience in life so far is that when it comes to money, the true xters of individuals would be exposed!

    This is not about faith or love but being WISE!The scripture says; Be humble as a dove but wise as a serpent! but the present events happening in this wicked world we are living, have made people to be wiser than the serpent! SO to prevent gold-diggers from getting away with the 'sweat' of many generations in a twinkle of an eye,
    A CAPITAL YES! my sistah.

  3. I agree with your view on pre-nups. When we marry from in a proper Christian way (the original way that God intended it to be), divorce should never be an option and once you marry whatever is yours is your spouse's and vice versa. So I don't believe in pre-nups. If you seek God's face about your spouse before saying "I DO" and continue to seek God for wisdom during your marriage, then till death do us part should be your testimony.

  4. I totally agree with Blessing on this one.

    If we seek God's face before saying 'I do' and hold on to Him there will be no cause for alarm as He will be the foundation the marriage will be built on and with God as the foundation, any marriage will go through storms safely.

    I don't believe in pre-nups, it is also a foundation for the livelihood of divorce!

  5. Thank you guys for your comments. It's good to glean from many and I'm sure someone will find this useful someday.
    @Nitty/ @ "goldiggers getting away" as always you crack me up... :)

  6. the only reason why a christian would consider having a pre-nup is as a result of lack of trust in partner and fear of the marriage not ending well.

    but i dont't think if a christian should sign a pre-nup means they have committed a sin, its a matter of choice really.
    i personally would not.

    thanx for shedding more light in this area.

  7. Complicated!!! Very my friend.

  8. Rainjoy thanks for your comment. I like the fact that you highlighted that the pre-nup itself is probably not a sin but what of the divorce?
    Is the divorce itself right in the first place?
    This is probably gonna ruffle some feathers but hey lets go for it... :)
    I guess as Mbini says it is tricky...

  9. the issue of divorce applied to a christian is only allowed based on the unfaithfulness of a partner according to what i read from my bible ooo

    Matt 19:9 'I can guarantee that whoever divorces his wife for any reason other than her unfaithfulness is committing adultery if he marries another woman.'

    but then i've heard of christians who file out divorces based on other issues. God help us for only Him knows best.

  10. I agree with maid of heart...

  11. Why prepare for divorce in a christian marriage? The bible says God hates divorce. So why plan for its happenstance? Should my spouse raise such question at this time, I may call it quit cos to me, its telling, "we wont go too far...; so why dont we plan for a debunk?"

    Thoughtful post!

    - LDP

  12. Heaven yes!! Pre-nup all the's if HE is rich off course..!

    Just kidding...

    Marriage with a man should be entered into without any thoughts of failure right? Just like 'marriage' with the Lord. It's like saying:

    'OK God, I'm entering into salvation now. You reign, I reign...BUT....

    Couldyoupleasebesokindastosignalongthedottedlineofthis15pageformIhave herejustincaseI findittoodifficultanddecidetooptout.

    After all, You own everything, so it's a win win situation for me...right? What's that God? Who was my counselor?? My Lawyer off course!'

  13. The question should not be limited to just Christians !
    A straight forward, black and white answrer is impracticable.
    There should be exceptions.
    There are grey areas in-between.
    As a True Believer, the answer is a BIG NO !
    It breeds suspicion and mistrust anyway.
    God is big enough to protect the finances HE gives you.
    To DIG for 'GOD'S GOLD' should be a fearful thing for any Believing spouse ( It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God....HEB 10:31).
    Ask Judas who carried the money-bag ! ....John 13:29; Matt 27:5)
    Judgement was swift !
    What if as a very well-to-do Christian Parent, an unbelieving in-law is to be one of your heirs?
    What if a believer, desperate for love, unequally yokes themselves?
    In these situation, be wise ! .....Lk 16:8

  14. A Godly and Christian Marriage is a Faith-Based Divine Covenant, the 'terms and conditions being enshrined in HIS WORD.
    On the contrary, a Pre-nup is a Fear-Based agreement (contract) which is an aberration of Marital values and a perversion of 'TRUE-LOVE' !

  15. Thanx Rainjoy, Chizzy, LDP, Fatima and Isi for sharing your views.... :))

  16. well sha,prenup is a good consideration just as a life insurance is a good consideration too since no one wants to die or get divorced.But as a planner in Naija I don't think that is a way to go o. Husband n wife will say u have bad belle for them especially if u r unmaried. lol


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